Chapter 23 - A Guide for Those Who (Still) Don’t Know What They Want to Be When They Grow Up
Exploring ‘How to Be Everything’ by Emilie Wapnick
![Emilie Wapnick, author of How To Be Everything, gives TED talk about Multipotentialites Emilie Wapnick, author of How To Be Everything, gives TED talk about Multipotentialites](https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1456,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fbucketeer-e05bbc84-baa3-437e-9518-adb32be77984.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F22c7d6b9-3146-400f-8805-026827354ac3_800x499.jpeg)
What do you want to be when you grow up?
What did you want to be when you grew up? What was your answer to that when you were a child? Don’t worry, I won’t laugh.
Grown-ups only ask you that when you’re little so that they can gush about the cuteness of your response.
No-one cares about what you want to be when you grow up. No-one expects you to become an astronaut or a ballerina or a detective.
They only care that you pick a thing and stick to it. Not the thing you wanted to be as a child — that would be weird. I mean pick a grown-up thing. Get a job and that’s your lot in life.
What one thing do you want to do for the rest of your life at the expense of all your other interests? Do you feel uncomfortable answering that question? That’s what they meant.
What do you do?
You ever noticed how someone’s opening gambit when they meet you is to ask: “What do you do?” Instead of: “Who are you?”
What’s more — they treat the answer to the first question like it’s the answer to the second.
People act like you’re supposed to pop out of the womb knowing what your mission in life is. If you did: That’s great. Good for you. Have a biscuit.
Some of us don’t. Some of us have a bunch of things that we want to be or do. Some of us hate the fact that we’re expected to narrow down our interests.
Why do I have to pick one thing? I want to do all the things. My job title doesn’t define who I am thank you very much.
Sometimes you do stuff for a while but get bored and dive into something else. Sometimes you switch careers at the drop of a hat.
Society tells you to get back in your box.
Your career is a lifelong commitment to one thing at the expense of everything else. Don’t you know that? Do you expect to be happy or fulfilled or something? Perish the thought.
You’re allowed to have hobbies on weekends but you’ve got to keep your nose to the grindstone the rest of the time. That’s what they want you to believe.
Well I’m here to tell you that, to quote Linda in Lucifer, “That’s not how this works.”
You don’t have to settle, you don’t have to do only one thing, and you’re not alone if you think that this mentality sucks.
It turns out you’re not alone. There is an alternative path. There are people with a wide range of interests and talents that they’re free to explore.
They’re called multipotentialites — and, if you’ve read this far, you may be one of them.
What’s a multipotentialite?
A multipotentialite is someone with lots of interests and creative pursuits.
It comes from the word multipotentiality — a term used in psychology and education.
Think polymath, renaissance person, or wearer of many hats.
The multipotentialite tag gained popularity thanks to Emilie Wapnick.
Who is Emilie Wapnick?
Emilie Wapnick is an award-winning author who wants people to embrace their multipotentiality.
Emilie’s TED talk on the subject, titled Why some of us don’t have one true calling, went viral.
It’s a great place to start if you’ve never heard of multipotentialites before.
The book How to Be Everything by Emilie Wapnick is the companion piece to that talk and expands upon it.
It encourages people to explore their multipotentiality rather than shy away from it.
How to Be Everything
A multipotentialite has various interests and may jump between projects without finishing them.
Don’t look at me like that — there’s no need to feel guilty about it — it’s how you’re wired.
Once you accept that tendency you can learn how to use your flightiness to your advantage.
The book is friendly and engaging. It’s like listening to the support and encouragement of a well-meaning friend.
It helped me to understand and accept my natural tendencies. It’s nice to know that I’m not alone and not a complete basket case.
It’s ok to explore different interests. It’s ok to abandon projects once you’ve learnt all you can from them. It’s ok to evolve and change.
I can see this book being especially of use to creative young people.
Much of it is about not worrying about fitting in with society or other people’s expectations.
Give a copy to any teenager who’s sick of people expecting them to justify what they want to do with their life.
It might help them figure out what they want out of life or encourage them to tell people to mind their own business.
I’m down with that despite being an old fart.
Do you want to do it all?
The book’s advice makes perfect sense to me.
Explore all your creative interests. Find ways to combine your talents even when they don’t seem related. See how far the rabbit hole goes.
You can build an unconventional life by connecting your passions together.
It’s good to know I’m not the only square peg who doesn’t fit into a round hole.
If you have a bunch of interests, and have trouble juggling them, then this is the book for you.
Wapnick suggests that more people are multipotentialites than you might first think.
Instead of feeling bad about it we should lean in, stop apologising, and embrace who we are.
Can you please explain the gap in your employment?
I found these ideas especially useful and empowering when applied to the workplace.
Now I can explain my diverse work history to potential employers with my head held high.
I’m not a hobo writer bum — as I may have said before — but a multipotentialite with a passion for writing and travel.
Along the way, I developed a professional expertise in journalism, communications, and PR.
I left my previous role to focus on writing and travel. I’ve since built a large audience for my work across several digital platforms.
So suck it!
Ok, I may say it a bit nicer than that in a job interview, but you get the idea.
Don’t let them look down on you for not sticking to one thing your entire working life.
The four multipotentialite work models
The book outlines four work models and strategies for multipotentialites to try. These are the Group Hug, Slash Approach, Einstein Approach, and Phoenix Approach.
Of course there are four approaches and not only one — we’re multipotentialites!
This helped me to rethink different ways that I could approach my career and creative work.
Is there a job that combines all my interests? Should I take part-time work and do my creative work on the side? Or should I stick it to the man and turn my side hustle into a business?
The book is about how to be everything — not how to make money doing everything.
Unlike several other books I’ve read on the subject it isn’t an apologist for the gig economy. Nor does it pander to millennials with special snowflake syndrome.
It offers an alternative approach to career planning for individuals brimming with talent.
Don’t try to make yourself fit into a specialist corporate culture — make your career fit you.
Life’s too short to spend it wearing someone else’s clothes.
I mean don’t pretend to be someone you’re not — not don’t wear other people’s clothes — I’m not trying to tell you how to live.
As the American poet Mary Oliver said: “Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?”
Rabbit, rabbit, rabbit
Whilst trying to write this book review I ran down several rabbit trails.
I rewatched the TED Talk which led to several hours of important internet research.
I played about a hundred games of FreeCell. What do you mean that doesn’t count as important internet research?
I even tried to use AI to write the first draft in the hopes of saying something unique and insightful.
All it did was reword other people’s book reviews and it didn’t even do a good job of that.
So if anything I’ve said looks a little too familiar please don’t hold it against me.
My robot overlords made me do it! They keep me in a cage but give me tea and biscuits when I do as I’m told.
What else can I say?
There’s so much that people have already said about multipotentialites.
I could write at least ten different articles about the subject if I don’t get distracted by ten more ideas.
Do I write about Emilie’s childhood punk band Frustrated Telephone Operator?
Do I write about their website, Puttylike, which is a home for multipotentialites?
Do I write about my own experiences as a multipotentialite?
Do I write about the etymology of the word and all the other uses of similar terms throughout history?
Do I write about the weird fixation that society seems to have on specialisation?
Do I write about what I wanted to be when I grew up? How as a child I said I wanted to make films but realised pen and paper was cheaper so switched to writer instead?
About making films as a metaphor for multipotentiality?
How writing is a hammer, for me, so everything looks like a nail?
About sometimes wishing I could pursue a career in stand-up comedy? Or wondering, in secret, if I should have tried to make films instead after all?
As sci-fi author Robert Heinlein said: “Specialisation is for insects.”
Thank you, I’ll be here all week
I’m trying to be funny. I’m also trying to express the futility of writing book reviews.
All I actually want to say is that I read the book, I loved it, and you should read it.
There. I said it. Can I go play outside now?
How to Be Everything by Emilie Wapnick is excellent. It struck a chord with me on a deep personal level.
I listened to the audiobook whilst traipsing through snow and came back all inspired.
Multipotentialites of the world unite!
How to be Everything — A Guide for Those Who (Still) Don’t Know What They Want to Be When They Grow Up by Emilie Wapnick is available as a book and an audiobook. If you want to know how to make money as a multipotentialite you should also check out Emilie Wapnick’s Renaissance Business: Turn All of Your Passions into One Business. These are affiliate links but this isn’t a sponsored post. I genuinely loved this book. If you use them I may receive compensation at no additional cost to you. All views remain my own.